Proven Factors that Lead to Divorce
It’s a very important subject Proven Factors that Lead to Divorce, as well as very sensitive because a lot of people don’t expect to go through a divorce when they’re saying I do to their spouse, they know deep down in their hearts that they’re doing the right thing but later on, in life, they realize it wasn’t the right thing or it didn’t work out.
What are the five stages of divorce
Proven Factors that lead to divorce or reasons why most people divorce.
1) Lack of Appreciation — It’s one of the proven factors of divorce, lack of appreciation. when a couple decides to get married they believe deep down in their hearts, they know enough about the person that they’re marrying to, they believe,
=> They understand their occupation
=> They understand their needs
=> They understand exactly where this person wants to go
But what tends to happen is that the couple takes life for granted eventually, they find themselves just running into each other, they find themselves butting heads, they find themselves conflicting on so many different interests which cause them,
- To move away from each other
- To appreciate each other less
- To even separate a little bit
Because the fact is so many people have the need to be appreciated including married couples as everyone wants to feel important.
Note — Whenever a person feels unappreciated at all they tend to neglect the issues, they tend to insult their spouse or even ignore their spouse because they don’t feel the appreciation at all.
The result, that forces them to look in other places, a many-to-many relationship where they can find appreciation that’s why so many people commit an affair because they find someone else outside of the relationship that shows them all this appreciation, compliments which is something that they haven’t seen with their spouse.
Advice — Show appreciation to your spouse, tell them how much you love them, give them gifts and do whatever to show that you truly love them, that’s how to save marriage during separation.
2) Different Goals — The second proven factor that leads to divorce is different goals. When they get married, they say,
=> I do, I will be with you together forever like salt and pepper I’ll do whatever it takes to live my life so I can help you to achieve your goals.
But the problem is that they never set any goals, they never made a plan for life so they don’t know exactly what it is that they’re pursuing, what those goals are?
That’s a problem now when a couple starts to live together they start talking, they start realizing that they have goals. Sometimes they may have separate goals, ambitions, and desires, At times those desires aren’t communicated or maybe they’re miscommunicated.
So the couple ends up getting so frustrated they realize that
=> They’re not even in the same book
=> They’re not even in the same library
=> They’re not even in the same house
Which makes an emotional distance.
Advice- Create a plan of action, you need to make sure that the person you want to marry is the person that’s gonna helps you to reach your highest goals. Set the right goals with your spouse, make sure you set that purpose and become completely intentional which results in not losing yourself in a relationship.
Note — If you find yourself being a little selfish and hold this person back from achieving their goals then that’s your problem, you’ve got to figure out what you can do to start helping them to reach their goals.
If you’re the one that’s leaving this relationship, you need to bring your spouse onboard instead of it being your goals, it needs to be our goals, you need to bring the two people together.
3) Finances — The other proven factors that lead to divorce are finances, it’s one of the most important divorce factors because so many people don’t understand how their money works. When it comes to financial matters.
You have to make sure that money’s allocated to the right places at the right time in the right ways because if this friction begins to happen with your money then your spouse may lose hope they may even feel they’re losing control.
They may be diverted from the plan of action that you have originally planned, another important thing when it comes to finances it’s your mentality because if you want to change your reality you got to change your mentality, you got to change the way you think about money.
Note — Some couples many times want to spend and others want to save like,
=> The man wants to gamble but the woman wants to invest.
=> The man wants to earn but the woman wants to hang out whatever it is you’ve got to figure out what your mentality.
Advice — When it comes to all of your financial affairs, just discuss with your spouse, make sure your goals are completely aligned so that your money will grow.
4) Miscommunication — The other proven factor that leads to divorce is no communication or miscommunication. You live with someone doesn’t mean that you’re communicating with them all the time or doesn’t mean you’re communicating with them in the right way.
A lot of times in a marital relationship nonverbal communication is the foot-stomping you.
Advice — Communicate with your spouse because understand it’s the most important relationship in your life, you can’t neglect it. you can’t say that your boss is more important or your friends are more important than the person that you live with, not happy with the current circumstance.
Note — A lot of times people think, I’ve communicated with my spouse but she doesn’t get it or he will never understand or he is just not supportive.
A healthy relationship includes good communication, fairness, and trust
How to communicate with your spouse more effectively?
Your spouse will understand if you communicate in love if you show them in terms that they understand not in terms you understand.
Because if you’re a logical person and trying to speak to an emotional person that might not work, you have to become emotional with that person or vice versa. You have to understand exactly how that person thinks. While communicating with your spouse make sure,
=> The timing is right
=> Your tone is correct
=> You’re sharing the message in love
So that they can understand exactly and reduce the marriage heat.
5) Selfishness — The other proven factor that leads to divorce is selfishness. These people are stringing up selfish. They don’t care, they don’t love you as much as they say they do, they don’t compromise, they don’t do anything to show that they are in a marital relationship.
Note — If you’re dealing with a very selfish person, do besides communicate your needs over and over again. you have to understand that they will need a reality check but you can’t force it.
You can’t hope that they’re gonna get sick or someday they’re gonna die because that will cause you a path of negative thinking. So many people end up falling into this negative way of thinking that they end up forgetting about how important their relationship actually is.
Advice — If you’re a selfish person then you need to make changes instantly. You need to understand exactly what to do, let go of your ego, and go to your spouse and apologize. Do something that will make them happy, do something that they’ve been asking for a long time.
It’s not always easy to realize if you’re a selfish person but you need to approach your spouse.
Risk Factors for divorce
a) No Intimacy — The other factor that leads to divorce is sex if a couple isn’t getting the right kind of sex that they’re gonna fall out of love then they get cold toward each other.
It’s created some tension within the house if you want to change that then you’ve got to activate your partner in a sexual way,
=> You’ve got to understand their sexual needs and make sure that you can fulfil or fulfill them most appropriately.
=> If you feel, you’re out of touch with your partner in a sexual way then it’s time to test them in a different way than they don’t expect it, it’s time to do things that you’ve never done before or maybe need to be more romantic.
Make sure you meet the needs of your spouse and help them understand your needs as well.
b) Neglect — Why most people divorce because of neglect, they neglect the most important issues that the relationship is facing at the moment maybe there’s something that’s going on in the family, there’s not being talked about. whatever it is you’ve got to figure out exactly what it is that you’ve been neglecting for many days.
Note — The only way that you can ever heal your relationship is to become more conscious of it to become more mindful of the needs.
If you have kids, what are your kids need, if you have a spouse that wants to do something why they want to do it? What can you do to get them? If there are family differences or you have different cultures within your family what can you do to understand your spouse’s family and vice-versa?
Advice — Figure out what the issues are and do whatever you can do, create a plan of action so that you can confront and attack it most appropriately.
Hope by reading these Proven Factors that Lead to Divorce with advice may change your mind if you are going through it, try to amend in your relationship for your betterment. Wish this could avoid the divorce, any queries just comment at Games in love.